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Key
Issues
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Self-Image
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Goal
Focus
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Relationships
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Community
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| Autonomy / Tentative
Choices (18 - 26) |
Autonomy vs. Dependence,
Tentative vs. Lasting Choices |
Developing sense of personhood
as separate from parents and childhood peer groups |
Defining self as an individual and establishing an initial life
style
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Testing out new relationships (e.g., love interests, peer groups,
and friends)
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Realigning focus from family of origin to new
peers and groups
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| Young Adult Transition (27-31) |
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Turmoil vs. Certainty,
Settling Down vs. Keeping Things Open
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Questioning sense of self and who/what we want to become
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Re-assessing initial life style and making more permanent choices/
commitments
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Sorting out and deciding which relationships will become more permanent
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Re-thinking and evaluating commitments and connections
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| Making Commitments (32-40) |
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Master vs. Apprentice,
Permanent vs. Tentative Choices
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Firming up/establishing a more permanent sense of self and who/what
we want to become
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Deciding a life direction and defining/aggressively pursuing a
dream of what we want to accomplish in life
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Making more permanent commitments to love relationships, friends,
and peers
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Establishing more permanent connections and community ties/ responsibilities
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| Mid-Life Transition (40-48) |
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Resolving Key Polarities
Immortality vs. Mortality,
Constructive vs. Destructive,
Nurturing vs. Aggressive
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Re-examining realities of projected ego and
image vs. true self and struggling to define/accept true self
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Questioning the dream whether or not it was achieved
and developing a more mature sense of what is really important
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Recognizing/ acknowledging one's own negative and
positive impact on relationships and correcting course for deeper,
more authentic connections
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Disengaging from group and cultural pressures/norms
to re-evaluate and restructure priorities
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| Leaving a Legacy (49-65) |
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Contribution vs. Personal Benefit, Other vs. Self-Centered,
Social vs. Independent Accomplishments
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Letting go of earlier inaccurate ego images and
accepting oneself as a worthwhile being with weaknesses as well
as strengths
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Making the best of the time one has left to help
others and leave a positive legacy
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Settling into more realistic and rewarding relationships
based on recognizing/ forgiving each other's imperfections as human
and helping each other grow
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Re-engagement on a deeper, more objective, less
driven and more productive, level with family, friends, and society
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| Spiritual Denouement (66 and beyond) |
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Hope vs. Despair,
Survival of Spirit vs. Mortality,
Surrender vs. Control
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Accepting self as dependent on a wisdom greater
than one's own, recognizing that wisdom as benevolent, and submitting
one's self and life to that wisdom's will
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Tying things up and completing the development of
the person/spiritual being we want to become
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Accepting others and recognizing/ respecting humankind's
diversity as part of a greater wisdom's plan
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Recognizing that life is only part of a larger,
more enduring spiritual community and helping others understand
that
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Reflection.
Capture this moment in time and print this page for your records.
Look at what you've done. What does this tell you? What impact might
it have on the life values you've ranked as most important to you
right now? How might your priorities be changing if you are currently
in transition between stages?
Next:
The next self assessment will help you consider what values you
might want to focus on longer term as you complete these life stages.
Continue to Longer Term Values Introduction

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